Monday, October 28, 2013

Minions for Dayzzz

     I really quite enjoy this story because Abraham shows incredible bravery and altruism in the face of an incredible vindictive and brutal god, you know the one who wiped out the whole human race before. God appears to Abraham at his tent with a couple heavenly hosts and informs him that his aging wife will soon be able to bear child. Sarah finds this a bit comical, seeing as how she's getting on in her years, but the Lord insists that he can do pretty much anything(Aside: I love the quote "But Sarah denied, saying 'I did not laugh'; for she was afraid. He said, 'Oh yes, you did laugh.'"). Then one of the angels leaks the news that God is about to royally ream Sodom and Gomorrah, and Abraham makes one hell of a daring move. In the most bad ass case of altruism on the human record Abraham straight up argues with God, all for the sake of saving some people who are probably too shitty to be worth saving. He questions how the god of righteousness could justly destroy a city if it wasn't all bad, so if God found that there were enough good people in Sodom he would spare it. Abraham argues God down to ten individuals, ten good people could save Sodom(Note: this is where the number for the Jewish minion comes from( the number of Jews required to say certain parts of a worship service)). Anyway, there weren't ten measly souls in Sodom worth saving, which isn't surprising considering they tried to rape the angels God sent to save Lot.
        Speaking of Lot. Why are the only people that God saves from destruction ever perverts? First Noah, and now Lot. The four people who God saved were all awful. Lot offered up his two virgin daughters to the rape-hungry mob in the angels' place, his wife missed Sodom, looked back and was justly turned to salt, and his two daughters got their father drunk and then seduced him. These are the people who should have been destroyed in the carpet bombing of Sodom. Sorry, Abraham, whatever God says, let the record stand that there were 0, not 4, people in Sodom worth saving.

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